Pigs with Pencils
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  • August1st

    I had a sobering thought today. If I were to have spent all this time on my book and put it into my painting instead–I’d been showing real mastery now. Maybe it’s not fair to think on things in this fashion–after all, I have an MFA and a work history behind me. A year’s worth of solid everyday intensive work would make a huge difference–because that difference would be all about the refinement of existing skill.

    But instead, I’ve taken a different path. I’ve decided to try something new. Ground zero type of new. Self taught ground zero. Well, if you have talent, you can build skill. I’ve always maintained that. I guess I’m just wondering how wise or perhaps unwise I’ve been with my time.

    I wouldn’t wonder about it at all, if I didn’t have this other option. But I do. I could be doing some nice illustration right now, and that has its own great joys about it.

    It’s not wrong to try new things. Sometimes that’s the only way we find new passions in life. But there is a danger in it too–especially if you already know you have talents elsewhere. Who is to say that the quest for my book will only lead me to passable mediocrity–when that same time spent in another venue would lend itself to true mastery? It’s not that I am unwilling to push and try to learn and build my skill at my new venture…I think over my long time at working and reworking, I’ve proven to myself that I certainly have what it takes to at least finish–that’s extremely important to me–to finish.

    But there is no guarantee that even though I’ve tried very hard, I simply won’t have what it takes to achieve something worth all of that time, except in my own personal world. That’s really the truth with any project. But the difference between a professional and a hobbyist is that the professional continues on working very hard at building skill, where the hobbyist is rightfully content with enjoying the work of their hands, skill level being relative and not so much the point.

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  • July27th

    Taken that quiz have you? I’ve put in my manuscript several times, in several pieces…but now that I have 4000 words of my new draft available it’s coming up L. Frank Baum–the writer of The Wizard of Oz.

    Content I wonder? Word choice? They say they’ve improved the algorithm to better discern the truth. I don’t feel like I read like him–but content-wise–we aren’t far from the truth. Darker. Far darker…but we aren’t quite to that part in my new draft.

    I’ve been really worried about how I can put some of these elements together, afraid they might unbalance each other–and it still might be true. But in each, I find such worth. If I had to tell them separately, I would do it. I would suffer another book. That’s saying a lot. Maybe everything.

  • July23rd

    Symbolism. Working on it as I go. Choosing now what I know is already in the draft and making it more specific. The specific naming of things. A bird becomes a wren or raven.  Ground cover becomes sweet clover. That’s where we are at. Description through POV and symbolism.

    The bigger issue will invariably be–when and how to bring in hero#2. Hero #1′s world is coming to life now. If I leave it untouched from the draft, the readers will be heavily invested in Hero #1 and that world–Hero#2 might be like a splash of cold water to the face…I’m just not sure.

  • July21st

    Well, following my train of thought, you had to know that this one is coming.

    I’m rewriting of course and thinking about setting as personal symbols for my POV character. In my original draft, the opening scene focuses on an event, one whose significance doesn’t show up until later. But, with my rethinking–I’ve rethought this too.  It’s strange in its own way. I hadn’t planned it out when I wrote it–but it fits and fits solidly into a greater context. Maybe my subconscious knew when I first wrote it–now I’m using it to what I hope will be powerful effect to those who read deeply.

    My character wants something in this scene and she’s willing to risk for it. In my original draft, it’s vanity that motivates. She just wants this thing and getting it leads her into trouble.

    In this draft, I’ve changed why she wants it. It’s no longer vanity–and more importantly, what she thinks it will do once she gets it comes into play…because now this item is a symbol–and she doesn’t understand what it represents when she gets it. She doesn’t understand that the nature of the item, it grants her desire, yes–but unexpectedly.

    Setting as personal symbolism for the POV character. And now a step even farther–Symbol that has meaning as a symbol, beyond the comprehension of the character.

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  • July20th

    I’ve changed my working schedule a little. I’m writing in the morning, and late at night. In the morning I’m editing what I wrote the night before and adding a little if I can. I’m not pushing forward as hard as I did  in the draft. I’m trying to get things close on target before I leave it for a new chapter. I’m planning on printing it out, a hard copy to live with for a while, to compare to my earlier version and my notes. Sometime changing format changes what you notice. The word count is going up though. Progress is being made. No longer dreading the minimum word count, its coming easier as the vision grows stronger.

    I feel like painting though. I don’t know why, but I just do. There was a tutorial some months back that I really wanted to do, it’s very light, a watercolor like style. Pastel, pretty. If I can find the the source files I’m going to do it–once things get straightened out at my house. It won’t be long before the push for school will be here. A big job. Exciting in its own way though. All those new things. New classes, new clothes, new folders and backpacks. The smell of slick vinyl raincoats in the cubbies.

  • July19th

    One third Done

    Posted in: Process

    One third through the redraft of my opening scene. At this point in the plot in draft#1 I was at 1,300 words–draft#2 at the same plot point I am at 3,700. And I think it still feels rushed. Rough transitions. Unclear thoughts. Shaky description in places. Tedious. It’s going to come down to paragraph by paragraph editing. Sentence to sentence. Word to word. And even then, who is to say that somehow my original version isn’t better? Different. I could be doing nothing but making things different and that my ability is topped out at this level–no matter the rewriting.

    Awful thoughts, but probably true.

  • July18th

    Sometimes I wonder if maybe all setting when viewed through POV isn’t personal symbolism for the character. I mean think about walking through your own house for a moment and describing what you find inside. Sure, some writers are going to tell me that they have a house with four bay windows, the rooms inside are painted white, and three people live inside…factual detail. They are going to argue with me that these details are simply that–details, something that is unchangeable, immutable, unemotional truth.

    Maybe so. Does it make for a good  story though?

    Maybe this same house, where the rooms are painted all in white, is on the market. The rooms have just been recently repainted. This family of three is breaking up–the fresh white paint, the empty rooms, the house for sale–everything trying to cover up a failed attempt at marriage. But even that doesn’t work  for the POV character who tells the story, even the new smell and fresh color is a constant and painful reminder. Fresh paint, fresh pain.

    Facts or personal symbols?

    Seriously. How hard can this be to understand? Nothing in fiction is accidental–or shouldn’t be. If you don’t see it when you write it–then pick it out when you do the redraft. Find the subtext. Create the symbol. Not everything of importance runs directly through the thoughts of the character. It doesn’t have to be specifically said in dialog to be true.

    The wife doesn’t have to cry into her cornflakes at breakfast and scream at her husband who is sitting across from her for the reader to get it. The vase of wilted half dead flowers on the table will suffice–and that’s shouting it to the rooftops. It could be far more subtle. If you write it, it’s looked at as significant. Readers are always “reading in” to your words. They are looking for meaning. Don’t waste that by just writing anything–don’t use non-specific detail because it hurts your brain to get up close and personal to the setting–make it work for your story–make it extremely relevant.

    Want to argue with me that setting is dead facts, a still photograph? Show me that same photograph and I’ll find a story in there. No people or dialog needed. Complete with guaranteed conflict of the life and death sort.

  • July17th

    I think at heart, I’m a fantasy purest of the most awful kind. A topic for an upcoming post.

    Right now setting and character. Some people seem to have the mistaken idea that writing is just about the emotional journey of the characters and that setting is irrelevant: put them on a beach, in space ship, in the desert south west, in a fantasy world—it’s all the same.

    No. It’s not. Say this to me, and I will think that you don’t write well–or haven’t written much. Remember this little piece of advice:

    Place, more than anything else, helps to explain who the characters are and why they are different. The Universality of human emotion is what draws us to them, but it is place that keeps us reading. It is place, that if done well enough, will stay with us after the book is closed.

    Never forget, we are in this particular place, at this particular time, to experience the story through this particular character. Place can only be experienced through POV, point of view. It’s not like a photograph, some kind of still objective picture of facts–no, this is a reality colored through the character’s perceptions, biases, fears, hopes and dreams. Many, many writers fail to understand that the detail you put into your setting can only be the detail that matters to your character. Setting is not props. Setting is a reflection of your character. Don’t believe it? Write the very same scene from two different POV characters. Things change meaning, depending on who is telling the story.

    Writers who don’t understand that setting isn’t just props are missing a critical tool, especially in learning how to describe  effectively. You can describe and at the same time, reveal subtext, underlying theme, and important personal symbolism through simple word choice.

    I wonder sometimes if anyone even pays attention to craft anymore. It takes time to write something well. Frustrated that there are so many mediocre books out there? Book that out right fail? Books that have everything and still don’t satisfy? This is why. It takes time and it takes care, and maybe it takes insight too–something people don’t have, and don’t seek out, and then take as invalid if it doesn’t fit into their poorly constructed stories.

    Learn to listen writers….take everything you hear as seriously as you can–flattering or not. Stop worrying about getting published. Start worrying about what you are writing. Focus on the now. Focus on the small things. Don’t throw out another inferior work–try to write something of lasting meaning. Please.

  • July15th

    Sounds like a light-hearted joke…credit me for having a sense of humor. This is a tough, painful surgery, one that pain management really means possibly taking the edge off–on a good day. On a bad day, it’s horrifying.

    My job is micro-managing fluid intake and round the clock pain med administration. I never knew my cell phone had such a nice alarm on it. Handy.

    Well…off to work.

  • July14th

    Really?

    Posted in: Critique, Musings

    I took a silly little on-line writing analysis test..the same scene, both my POV rewrites for hero #1 and hero #2 submitted together mishmashed.

    Apparently, my project sounds like a combination of L. Frank Baum, Chuck Palahniuk  and Vladimir Nabokov. Not by content per se, but by word choice, sentence structure, description—and yet, crazy as it is–it actually does touch on content as well. There are elements of each one in the story as a whole. I am dubious that 1,000 words could show that. Computers can’t read and understand mood or tone! And yet surprising accurate.

    With that summary of style and intriguing set of comparisons, one could write a  knock-out sexy back of the book cover copy. I shall squirrel it away for a future moment.